Failing a Personality Quiz

I saw this free personality quiz on line and thought, “Hmm, I could roll the trash can out before the garbage truck comes, or I could take this quiz.”

cartoon drawing of man fidgeting with jacket to avoid conversation
“Do you find it easy to meet new people, or do you pretend you’re trying to get your jacket unzipped until they move away?”

It started by asking about social skills like:

“Would you rather play charades at a party with strangers, or stay home and staple your knee caps?”


Then it moved into the self image: “Do you think of yourself as smart or average?”  I think the average person is smart. But I think above average people are smarter than below average people. So, I’d have to say I’m smarter than below average.

Then there were two questions that seemed like the same question but with different words. Kind of like when news reporters ask the same question but pretend it isn’t. It asked:

“What do you like the least about yourself?” a) looks, b) personality, or c) intelligence.” The second question was, “Which do you wish you had more of?” a) looks, b) personality, or c) intelligence.

You would think they would both be the same answer, right? After all, if you like your looks the least, wouldn’t you wish you had more of that? But that seemed too obvious, so I said “a” for the first and “b” for the second, to let them  know I had plenty of “c!”  I wonder if they grade on a sliding scale?

Next up was a series of questions relating to how you think people view you?  Which is kind of tricky, because how can you answer how people view you, if they aren’t the ones answering the question? Are you suppose to say what you think they think you think? Or what you wish they would think of you? Or what they wish you think they think?  I couldn’t decide, so I chose “a” for all of them, hoping to get at least one or two right.

I thought it was going to be easy, but it was worse than taking the SAT.

  •  “Do you need others to tell you what to do in order to make up your own mind?”
  • “Do you pretend to agree with people because you don’t know what they’re talking about?”
  • “Are you worried about the results of this test?”

I was getting so stressed by the line of questioning I just started clicking on answers without reading.  After two hours, I realized the garbage truck had already driven by, and I had clicked on an ad and signed up to adopt endangered mussels in Florida.

Luckily I was able to backtrack to the personality exam and complete the final questions, which thankfully were easy:  name, credit card, social security and mother’s maiden name.

Once I filled in the final part, I got my results:

I’m an under achieving, curious, fiercely loyal, chaos navigator, with a tendency to exaggeration, combined with a pinch of delusion and tree hugging.  Pretty cool, right!

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Author: Shay

Shay is an action/adventure screenwriter and humor blogger. She has been married to Prince Charming for 24 years and they have two amazing and talented children.